Blah

I don't know what it is about this summer. I have been feeling depressed, very depressed. I am feeling ungrateful of all worldly things (and this marriage). At first, it seems that I don't care about the past, present and future, and that I am slowly losing my faith. But at a closer look, it is not that I do not care about the present and the future.

Being helpless usually instills nothing but fighting mechanism in me. As such, things eventually got better. This time around, I am just mad and being frigid. I refuse to correct the situations instead I act in ways that is destructive.

I'd like to think that this is merely a post wedding melancholy, but maybe I just lost it.

I don't like this and I don't like talking about it with any real person so I am channeling it out here.

Blah.